Back in December I wrote that I was going to begin using Xango, the new “cure-all” for ailments from arthritis, to intestinal difficulties to low energy. I was hoping to alleviate my arthritis (from a former fall) and was encouraged by the research I encountered. Xango got its name because Mangosteen fruit is rich with Xanthones (some research can be found at http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/e...)

The update is that my arthritis is still present, HOWEVER, I have noticed some interesting perks in using the product. Here’s what I did find after three months of daily use.

Number 1 - my energy level has increased tenfold.

Number 2 - I don’t have to take as much pain medication as before.

Number 3 - I actually lost 15 pounds because I drink the juice diluted with water and sweetened with Splenda which has totally stopped my nighttime snacking, and last, but not least,

Number 4- my skin looks great! No breakouts, no dehydrated wrinkly, scary parchment look, nothing! I have many compliments on my skin, and the only change I’ve made is drinking Xango.

I have to say that I am going to continue with Xango because it tastes great and has delivered some unexpected, but welcomed, results (Xango consists of reconstituted mangosteen juice,mangosteen pulp, concentrated apple juice,concentrated pear juice, concentrated grape juice, concentrated blueberry juice, concentrated raspberry juice, concentrated strawberry juice, concentrated cranberry juice, concentrated cherry juice, citric acid, natural flavour pectin, xanthan gum,and sodium benzoate)

The listed ingredients impressed me because almost every fruit listed was also touted as a daily antioxidant requirement by leading nutritionists.

I read some of the online “testimonials” for the product and saw that people believed it cured everything from cancer to arthritis, depression to weight loss. Two of the testimonials I read were: ‘I had a serious and aggressive tooth infection that spread through my entire mouth rapidly. I was in serious pain, and my teeth were even loose.  I began taking Xango juice the day I got it, and the next morning my gums had tightened slightly and I was feeling better.  Three days later and the infection was almost gone.’ ‘I've always craved sweets, even though my diet is pretty good.  After a few weeks on the Xango I've realized my sweets cravings are non-existent!’

If your interested, try these links.

http://www.mymangosteen.com/calbrecht" title="http://www.mymangosteen.com/calbrecht" target="_blank"http://www.mymangosteen.com/c...

or

https://go.xango.net/main.asp

Christine

For more of these articles, go to http://www.swanktrendz.com

Avril Lavigne is leading the pack with five nominations for a Juno. She’s nominated for Album of the Year, Pop Album of the Year, Artist of the Year, Songwriter of the Year and Fan’s Choice Award. Whew, hope it doesn’t go to her head.

Diana Krall, jazz ingenue and Elvis Costello’s better half, is nominated for four Junos. She’s nominated for Fan Choice Award, Album of the Year, Artist of the Year and vocal Jazz Album of the Year. I enjoy Diana’s voice, but I’ve also noticed that her octave range is extremely limited.

Also nominated are Billy Talent, Celine Dion (what a surprise), Feist, k-os, Simple Plan, Shania Twain, Bryan Adams, Keshia Chanté, Fefe Dobson, James Ehnes, Great Big Sea, Marc Jordan, Matt Mays, Bob Rock, Ron Sexsmith, Sum 41, Ryan Malcolm, Audrey De Montigny, Gary Beals, Marie-Élaine Thibert, Thornley, The Tragically Hip (I should hope so - Canada’s answer to REM), and Tafelmusik Baroque Orchestra.

A new category has been added - Video of the Year which is appropriate given the times we live in and how video images often drive the sales of cds.

The broadcast will feature performances by Neil Young, k.d. lang, Billy Talent, Simple Plan, The Wailin' Jennys, k-os and 2005 Juno Award Hall of Fame recipients The Tragically Hip.

My only question is, where are the nominations for Hot Hot Heat and Boy? Come on Eastern Canada, let’s get with the program. Not all acts are east of Winnipeg.

Be sure to catch the Junos on Sunday, April 3rd.

Christine

Lezah

For more articles like this, visit http://www.swanktrendz.com

Sometimes it seems like we're living in a cultural wasteland here in Vancouver (hey, quit throwin'... - eeew, what is that stuff?) - okay, I apologize, but you know what I mean - you want to go out and there're no good bands playing, no decent movies...

Fortunately, the opposite seems to be the case these days, especially musically.  I've already seem a ton of great new bands this year, and missed even more due to lack of time/money (most recently I missed The Kills, although I did see them when they were here in December, and Bloc Part, slated to be Britian's 'next big thing'; guests for this show were Erase Errata, another good act). Upcoming shows which promise to be good are:

March 31 - Ash at Richard's - their opening band, the Bravery, is a post-punk band that hails from NYC and is getting a lot of buzz

April 1 - Death From Above 1979 at Red Room - sold out (need I say more?)

April 6 - Soundtrack of Our Lives at the Commodore - I'm probably as excited about seeing their opening band, Montreal's The Dears, who took South by Southwest by storm last year

April 7 - Metric at the Commodore - purported to be a good, solid Canadian band, and their opening act is Elizabeth, a local band who opened for Hot Hot Heat in January

April 9 - Hot Hot Heat, with Futureheads and Louis XIV at the Commodore - can you think of a more perfect line-up?

April 11 - a second Hot Hot Heat show has been added - an all ages gig at the Croatian Cultural Centre

April 19 - co-headlining are new Scottish sensation Dogs Die in Hot Cars and France's Phoenix, at Richards

April 22-23 - The Killers (from Las Vegas), who put on a good show in September; at The Vogue

April 28-29 - U2 (who are currently living in Vancouver, prepping for their world tour) - sold out shows at GM Place

May 5 - perennial Canadian favourites Sloan, who are touring in support of their new greatest hits album and video release; with guests Magneta Lane, at the Commodore

May 7 - Gang of Four, at the Commodore

June 3 - Kasabian, at the Commodore - huge in the UK

Great turn around for the music scene.

Lezah 

How come the Pope never wears his hat anymore?

Maybe his ancient neck just can't support such a weighty headpiece.

That guy's spinal column is probably about as strong as a soggy communion wafer.

Do you think he'll be buried with his hat?

Is it even his or does it belong to "the Church"?

They'll probably just engrave his name and stats onto it and pass it on to the next Pope.

Which would make the 'Pope Hat' the Stanley Cup of Catholicisim.

Mike

For more of Mike's Musings, go to http://www.swanktrendz.com/ph...

Lion Brand Yarn Co.'s server crashed immediately after Martha's release as more than 40,000 frenzied knitters attempted to download a pattern called Coming Home that was posted on their website (www.lionbrand.com).

The anonymous knitter who crafted Martha's special outfit joins the ranks of other better known knitting practitioners such as Uma Thurman, Catherine Zeta-Jones and Julia Roberts as the knitting craze continues to sweep the nation.

Lezah

To all coffee lovers out there, beware:  this year's crop of Brazilian coffee was very small, which in turn translates to higher prices for all of us.

Since December, coffee prices in New York have risen 30%, by 2.2 cents US to $1.369 a pound.  Since Starbucks raised their prices in October, they have been able to maintain their current pricing, but the homebrew specialists haven't been so lucky.  Maxwell House and Folgers are both up 12%, while Hills Brothers and MJB are up 28 cents US per 13 ounce can.

Be warned...

Lezah

The Stupidest Thing I’ve Ever Done

One spring during the early morning aftermath of some belligerent weekend party, my associates (John, Philly-Phresh, Zack, Frenzy) and I found ourselves stranded in some poor girl’s basement. She had foolishly invited us to a party in her parents home and we had severely misbehaved. Within a few hours we had caused, either directly or indirectly, fights with the locals, property damage, vehicular damage and a brazen young whore to bail down a steep flight of stairs.

Our indiscretions had caused our young hostess to cry at her own party. On her birthday no less. As the night plowed forward, most of the sensible guests had already left or had already been kicked out. Through some drunken miscalculation my friends and I were left behind and forced to spend the night. Our gracious hostess informed us that she and her posse of irritated, female friends would be sleeping upstairs, while we, because obviously we were vile and disgusting people, would be banished to the unfurnished, concrete basement.

Passing out in a dirty basement on a mysteriously colored mattress I could do. But I refused to do it on an empty stomach. Unfortunately, there was no food in this house. Also, there was nowhere near this house where one could obtain food at this time of night. Mad with hunger (and drugs and alcohol), I began rummaging around the cold basement. It was then that I discovered a large freezer-box, and by 'freeze' I mean 'sub-zero'. The inside of the box was one gigantic, solid, icy mass of preserved foodstuff. There was nothing readily edible, but it was the only game in town. After much bashing and chiseling (with a large wrench) I managed to free a modestly sized piece of frozen chicken breast. It was ugly, and covered with wrench dents, but it was food, damnit.

I nearly broke my teeth, but managed to get a few morsels inside of me. When I returned to the room we were sleeping in, I found that Phil was still awake. "Is that food?", he spat. "Chicken," I replied, and tossed him the still frozen chunk of poultry. As I lay down to pass out, I heard Phil gnawing in vain on the rock-like meat.

Unable to sleep, I tossed and turned for the good part of an hour. It was then that I heard someone eating. Someone eating sloppily, with their mouth open. "Phil? Is that you?" "Yeah." "What are you eating?" "Here," he said, as he passed me a warm and jiggly little mass. "Dude, is this the chicken?" "Yeah." "How did you get it so warm?", I asked. "I thawed it out in my hands," he proudly exclaimed. Thankfully, it was dark in the basement, so I couldn't see the moist, disgusting little morsel Phil had heated with his grubby hands. This made it easier to eat without thinking of what I was actually eating. I ate it quickly and I ate it all. Then sleep came.

I awoke shortly after to the unpleasant sensation of having a stomach full of spinning, electrified, razor blades. There was a war going on inside me, and I was losing. I found I was unable to stand upright, so I had to crawl up the basement stairs to the kitchen, where I staggered, moaning loudly, past our young hostess’ parents. They said, "Good morning." I said, "..pain..."

My bowels were teeming with poisonous, bacterial magma.

I flew into the bathroom, locked the door, and sat where I would remain sitting for the next hour.

I sat and I cried.

I cried like a baby.

The pain.

Mike

A Good Old Fashioned Ghost Story

There’s nothing like a good ol’ ghost story to pique one’s interest in a past character’s life.

While traveling in Jamaica, I decided to tour the Rose Hall Plantation, built in 1770 as a sugar plantation. Rose Hall was named after the wife of George Ash, a wealthy English planter, who began work on the Georgian mansion in 1750. Ash died in 1752 before he could complete the house and Rose married three times more with John Palmer, her last husband, completing the house between 1770 and 1780. Palmer's grand-nephew, also named John, eventually inherited the estate. The nephew married Annie Mae Patterson in 1820. This plantation was known by the locals as the ‘Great House’ and, after Annie’s emergence on the scene, the home of the ‘White Witch’. My first thought was, who is this ‘White Witch’ and why was there such a fear of her and, after her death, a fear of her mansion?

Well, it turns out the White Witch was none other than Annie Palmer and boy, was she a force to be reckoned with. As the tour guide informed me, ‘Small packages can be deadly, like TNT’. This remark was in reference to Annie Palmer’s slight stature of 4’11’. I don’t think I would compare Annie to TNT - she was just downright evil.

As the story goes, Annie moved from Ireland to Haiti and her parents died from yellow fever when Annie was 8 years old. She was raised by her nanny, who happened to be a high voodoo priestess. At the age of 18, in 1821, Annie moved to Jamaica, and as they say, the rest is history.

Apparently Annie was very beautiful, very ambitious, extremely sadistic, and had a voracious sexual appetite. Annie quickly went through three husbands (hence her acquisition of Rose Hall), all dying of mysterious circumstances. Apparently one died by poison, one by stabbing and another by pouring boiling oil in his ear as he slept.

Annie was feared by her plantation slaves for good reason. She often found sport in torturing and killing them. She would set bear traps in the surrounding areas, then subject some hapless bear trap victim to the dungeon to die a slow and agonizing death. Slaves were routinely whipped, and at times, taken on as lovers prior to being murdered. The dungeon is now a lounge, and gift shop, with many notes from visitors littering the walls, declaring strange occurrences whilst visiting the mansion. Along with these notes is a picture of Annie’s mirror, with a clear reflection of an attractive woman in period dress, and the amateur photographer insists no one else was in the room at the time.

Annie’s end came during a general slave uprising in 1831. She was strangled by a well respected free slave named Takoo who was avenging the death of his granddaughter, whom he believed died as a result of Annie’s voodoo practises. Annie was only 29 at the time of her death after a drama filled eleven years in Jamaica.

One skeptical aside to this fabulous tale - there are no paintings of Annie Palmer, and no hard evidence that she even existed except through her larger than life legend. However, anyone who has encountered Annie’s, or an unfortunate slave’s, ghost would argue otherwise.

Rose Hall was in ruins when bought by Americans John and Michele Rollins in 1965. Although there had been many uprisings during the last 100 years, Rose Hall was never burned, vandalized, etc., as the people of Jamaica were still fearful of Annie’s revenge. The Rollins have restored the mansion to its former (glory)? and it is now one of Jamaica’s major attractions.

One final postscript - it was noted by the tour guide that Annie made have actually suffered from dementia caused by her tin and lead dinnerware. Through continuous use, Annie might have ingested large quantities of lead, a poisoning that can cause brain damage.

H.G de Lisser wrote a fictional account of Annie Palmer in his book, “White Witch of Rose Hall.’ A good, quick read.

Christine

Since my social life is of the chock-a-block-full, never-a-spare-minute whirlwind variety, I spent the weekend - wait for it - reading a book about grammar.

But hang on a minute:  this isn't just any grammar book, it's the #1 runaway best seller on both sides of the Atlantic 'Eats, Shoots & Leaves, The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation' (note the single quotation mark around the book title - I learned that from the book!).  Written by journalist Lynne Truss and dedicated "To the memory of the striking Bolshevik printers of St Petersurg who, in 1905, demanded to be paid the same rate for punctuation as for letters, and thereby directly precipitated the first Russian Revolution", Eats, Shoots & Leaves demystifies the complex world that is punctuation.

Of course, what separates this book from your usual run of the mill grammar book (of which I have many), Eats, Shoots & Leaves Is full of that pointed British humour that I so love. By page 48, not only had I learned two new things about punctuation, but I had also had three good belly laughs - no mean feat, any way you slice it.

From personal anecdotes to mocking Gertrude Stein, from dreaming about Opal Fruits (now unfortunately called Starburst) to quoting notables such as Martin Amis, Truss keeps the book skipping right along at a breezy pace while dispensing valuable punctuation advice, exposing punctuation-related horrors, passing along famous punctuation quotes, and illuminating punctuation history.

Truss discusses, among others, the ellipses (alternately described as 'the black hole of the punctuation universe' and 'a sub-species of the dash'); the apostrophe, about which she bemoans the fact that there are 'no laws against imprisoning apostrophes and making them look daft'; and 'expressive, attention-seeking punctuation' such as the dash, the exclamation mark (or exclamation point, if you're American), and the italic.

A quick, educational and humourous read, I highly recommend this book, and will try my best to practice what it preaches.

Lezah

Greetings fellow bloggers

I am currently on vacation, and I'd love for you "experts" to visit my new site and tell me what you think of the layout.  What's good, what's garbage, etc.  Remember, it is a Popular Culture site/blog so I can't toss everything.  Check out http://www.swanktrendz.com" title="http://www.swanktrendz.com" target="_blank"http://www.swanktrendz.com

If you have any pictures you'd like to send in to appear on our banners - please do, just sent to swanktrendz1@yahoo.ca.  Also, send in any ideas, or for that matter, contribute an article and get published. 

Look forward to hearing from you,

Christine et al

Due to the nature of my job, people are always asking me how many languages I speak. When I tell them that not only do I speak no language other than English, and in fact, can barely even speak English, I often get some strange looks. So be it.

The fact is, I have been painfully aware since my early days in elementary school that I am the Queen of Malapropisms. In grade 3, I had to give a 'speech' (I believe presentation would be the term used nowadays). Anyway, I chose as the topic of my talk Mt. Cook in New Zealand, for no other reason than the fact that my great-grandfather, who had been a landscape painter, had painted a large picture of Mt. Cook which was hanging in my living room. With the help of my mother, I lugged this huge painting into school, set it up at the front of the class and went through my whole talk. It wasn't until the end of the presentation, however, that it was pointed out to me that throughout the entire talk I had been saying Mt. Baker rather than Mt. Cook -a fact to which I was completely oblivious. Mt. Baker, FYI, is a large mountain just south of the border which we could see out of our school window.

Unfortunately, this happens to me all the time. More often than not, I will be saying something that could, in fact, sound somewhat intelligent if it wasn't for the fact that I'm SAYING THE WRONG FRICKIN' WORD for the whole conversation. Periodically people will correct me, but some people are just too polite to do so, and just give me these odd looks and slowly drift away... Just call me Mrs. Malaprop.

Lately, I've added spoonerisms to my repertoire. I've always been aware of (and mildly amused by) spoonerisms, but so far had managed to avoid them. In fact, my first job was working for a landscaping company, and one of the firms we dealt with was called Northlands Fallers and Buckers. Of course, when they answered the phone they only said Northlands, partly because the name was so long, but can you imagine the spoonerism on that one? I desperately wanted to hear a slip-up there, and gleefully would phone as often as I could, hoping and praying, but no luck.

So, back to me. Anyway, last Friday I'm talking to someone and pointed out a vehicle parked on the side of the road. Painted on the door was a logo for a Scrap Car company, which I inadvertently referred to as a Crap Scar. They next day, I was trying to say Test Chair, and it came out Chest Hair. Cripes! I've decided that I'd better give up this whole speaking biz altogether - people are starting to think I'm nuckin' futs.

Lezah

I've just stumbled upon an old/new design trend that could easily be a metaphor for my life. It's called Wabi-Sabi, and I call it old/new because it's been around since the 16th century in Japan, but it's only been in the last ten years or so that it's been introduced to westerners. Artist and architect Leonard Koren was the first to popularize it here, and since then a number of books have been written on it, including Robyn Grigg Lawrence's The Wabi-Sabi House: The Japanese Art of Imperfect Beauty, and Taro Gold's Living Wabi Sabi: The True Beauty of Your Life.

Wabi-sabi is a bit of a catchall term, and incorporates the idea of Wabi, or things that are simple or humble, with Sabi, things that gain beauty with age. Lawrence refers to Wabi-Sabi as something that 'celebrates cracks and crevices and all the other marks that time, weather, and loving use leave behind.' Sounds like it will fit in perfectly with my current decor - and budget!

Other Wabi-Sabi directives include:
- no clutter (this is one I have trouble with): no more than three items per surface
- chose handmade over manufactured items
- embrace asymmetry
- add earthy reds, browns and greens
- are items faded, aged and worn? No problem - this just adds character

The fact that Wabi Sabi asks practitioners to concentrate on 'the beauty of things as they are' and to 'set aside our judgments and our longing for perfection' fits in just dandy with me, my life and my house. I think I'm in love...

Lezah

My beloved is one of those people smart enough to run intellectual rings around me (he usually manages, politely, to restrain himself, however). A couple of years ago, he picked up a book in a thrift store he thought I might like called, A Thousand Acres by California-based author Jane Smiley. I was probably swayed toward reading this book as much by the fact that it had won the Pulitzer Prize in 1992, as by the fact that Smiley is a contributor to some of my favourite equine magazines such as Practical Horseman.

Anyway, to make a long story short, I plowed through the book (that was a pun - did you get it?) and once I had finished, my beloved asked me what the book was about. As I launched off onto a long rambling discourse involving plot and character summaries and everything in between; he picks up the book, reads the short summary on the back, and pronounces, "Oh, it's King Lear!" That stopped me dead in my tracks, let me tell you, because I instantly realized he was correct, and there was I having read the entire book, and that fairly significant point had just washed right over me. He hadn't even read the book, and he got it! I couldn't believe it. Such is my life.

However, that little interaction did serve to spur me on to read more of Smiley's novels in the hopes that more 'hidden secrets' like the aforementioned who pop up - and this time I'd get them! I can't recall what order I read the books in, but I have waded through the very lengthy tomes Moo, Horse Heaven and Good Faith. These three are quite different from A Thousand Acres in that they are very character dense - Horse Heaven, for instance, has 50 major characters in it. In these books, Smiley weaves an ambitious tapestry out of the lives of the characters, human and animal alike; the interrelated and interloping storylines are often a bit hard to follow, and I found myself on numerous occasions flipping to the front of the book to consult once-again the cast of characters.

Smiley's books are largely satirical in tone, and she seems to possess an almost encyclopedic knowledge of her subject matter, which investigates many of the differing landscapes of inner and outer America, with topics ranging from the horse world to academia, from the real estate world to farming practices.

Based on themes like sin and temptation, her novels could best be described as classical morality tales.

The Claremont Institute describes Smiley as "America's greatest novelist and most discerning and subtle political philosopher", while Smiley herself states that, "Every novel I write is political. It's not possible to suspend your critique of the world and enter some sort of pure apolitical realm. Your political views and your moral views connect you in a responsible way to other people, to society."
Smiley continues to write articles for magazines such as Vogue, Harper's and the New York Times Magazine; her essay on the election of Bush, posted at http://www.slate.msn.com brought the pro-Bush camp down on her (see http://www.jeffdoolittle.com); her novella, The Secret Lives of Dentists, was recently turned into a feature film starring Campbell Scott; and she seems to spend a lot of time on the speakers circuit.

In fact, Tuesday, Mar. 15, Smiley was speaking in Portland at the Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall (http://www.pova.com/event_cal...), and June 17-24 Smiley is appearing at the Santa Barbara Writer's Conference (http://www.sbwc.org).

For more books by Smiley, try: The Age of Grief, The Greenlanders, Ordinary Love and Goodwill, The All-true Travels and Adventures of Lidie Newton, or the recently released A Year at the Races.

Lezah

Last night at the Waldorf Astoria in New York, seven new inductees into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame were honoured.

Rockers The Pretenders and U2, soul singers Percy Sledge (When a Man Loves a Woman), Buddy Guy, and The O'Jays, founder and chair of Premier Talent Agency, Frank Barsalona and Seymour Stein, chairman of Sire Records, were all recognized for playing a "significant role in the evolution and spread of rock and roll."

The Rock in Roll Hall of Fame is located in Cleveland and had it's first induction ceremony in 1986. This year's ceremony will be broadcast on VH1 March 19 at 9 ET.

Lezah

Today I asked myself a question that I'm sure many of you have asked yourselves at one time or another. "If Jesus appeared in my kitchen, right now, in the flesh, what would I do?"

Well, the first thing I'd do (after introducing myself, of course) would be to ask Him to help me do my dishes, as at the moment they are stacked rather high. and I'm pretty sure he'd say yes; he'd have to, he's Jesus.

After that I’d offer Him a seat and ask a few questions. Did it hurt? How's your old man? How long are you back for? is Jesus a Beatles man or a Stones man? How good is He at Mario Kart? And then, after defeating Him in several races, I’d break out the big guns.

Look, Jesus! My bathtub is full of water! Change... it... to... wine. And, of course, he'd comply and it would be delicious. I would then ask Him if he had the ability to change 'already-wine' into some kind of 'super-God-wine'. and he probably could.

I’d probably go and do something greedy like tie him up in my bathroom, shackle Him right to the toilet, and force him to change gallons and gallons of tap water into delicious, intoxicating God-wine that I could drink and store and share and sell, becoming very popular and wealthy. I would enjoy living like this until I was a very old man, or until Jesus got sick of making wine and killed me with the Plague or something. He'd probably make it look like an accident.

Mike

Oh (cold) snap!
I am staying indoors.
it's cold enough to freeze the tits off an Ice Witch.
Beer. Coffee. Paint fumes.
and to a lesser extent, rice.
These are my blankets and heaters.
I'm staying here until provisions run dry.
Then I'm gonna cook me a frozen hobo.

Mike

Cracknor Cause Celebre, also known as Coco, is the cutest Norfolk Terrier you've ever seen - and probably the most expensive, now, as she just won the Crufts 2005 Supreme Champion title in England on Sunday.

Having made the finals for the last two years at Westminster, she was the favourite this year, partly because she was returning to the show ring off maternity leave after giving birth to three pups (Tom, Dick and Harry) earlier in the year.

Unfortunately, Coco's projected win was upset by the German Shorthair Pointer - but, apparently, you can't keep a good dog down, and Coco shook off the cloak of defeat, flew to England and stole the show. Now she can retire in style.

Way to go, Coco!

Lezah

Austin, Texas is apparently the "Live Music Capital of the World" and they're doing their best to live up to this name by once again hosting the South by Southwest Music, Film and Interactive Festival this month. As the name implies, the Festival is a mix of music, film and technology, and is currently in its 19th year.

Running through March 20, this year's festival boasts a huge contingent of British acts, with 91 British bands playing the festival, including The Go! Team, Kasabian, the Futureheads and new Scottish faves, Dogs Die in Hot Cars.

Canada is also well represented, with BC in particular sending a great bunch of bands. Hot Hot Heat and Be Good Tanyas are two of the homegrown acts that will be appearing on stage.

In addition to attending concerts, there are a number of other things for people to do, such as listening to Elvis Costello speak about his life, or participating in a master class given by rock legends Brian Wilson, Robert Plant, or John Cale.

Lezah

As I said before, not all trends are trendy. Case in point: spelling bees. Here in Vancouver, the regional spelling be was just won by 13 year old Tracey Hinder. Hinder and, second place winner, Nicaela Weigel will proceed to Ottawa for the Nationals.

All over North America, spelling bees are big business. The BC one was sponsored by, and closely covered by, The Vancouver Sun newspaper; in the States they are some spelling bees have been televised on Sports Networks as 'smackdowns'.

Probably more than a little bit of pressure there on the kids...

Lezah

The city of Nashville is joining all those other cities around North America that have theme-based art projects placed throughout the city (check out Vancouver's whale exhibits from last year).

For this show, Nashville-based artists have produced a series of 10 foot tall painted Gibson Guitars. These giant guitars will be on display from April to June of this year, and will eventually serve as a benefit to several local charities.

Lezah

After immediately selling out five shows in 11 minutes at New York's Hammerstein Ballroom, the Black Crowes added two more dates at the same venue, and have plans to tour throughout the US; dates have been confirmed through June, with more to follow.

This is the first tour that the Black Crowes have done in over four years.

For more information, go to http://www.blackcrowes.com

Lezah

30 year old Canadian classical guitarist Aaron Brock, a faculty member at the Royal Conservatory of Music in Toronto, recently won the Edwin H. and Leigh W. Schadt String Competition in Allentown, PA.

To win the $5000 top prize, Brock played Joaqui Rodrigo's "Concerto de Aranjuez for Guitar and Orchestra". Part of the prize also involves the opportunity to play a solo with the Allantown Orchestra.

Lezah

New Order hits the charts again with their 27th hit in 25 years, Krafty. Their eighth album, Waiting for the Sirens' Call, is due out later this month.

New Order has endured more than their fair share of troubles over their career, including the suicide of lead singer Ian Curtis from their Joy Division days, and the financial collapse of their former record label, Factory.  Death, debauchery and financial squabbling aside, New Order was at the forefront of the electronica movement and are regularly cited today as influences of top new bands like Interpol and Franz Ferdinand.

In addition to the new album, New Order has completed 18 more tracks, almost enough for two new albums.

Sounds like they're not planning on retiring any time soon...

Lezah

Diana the Princess

Although I was never a huge fan of Princess Diana, her unfortunate death was one of those "Where were you when..." moments in your life that you can probably count on one hand.  Had Chuck and Di stayed married, next year would have been their 25th wedding anniversary.  Instead, Charles is preparing to wed the woman who, it turns out, was the true love of his life, Camilla Parker Bowles, and Danish choreographer Peter Schaufuss has just premiered a new ballet called "Diana the Princess" which he refers to as a celebration of Diana's life.

 Schaufuss was Diana's former dance teacher, and has placed his sympathies squarely in Diana's camp, portraying the Royal family as "openmouthed fools".

The music is provided by The Cure and English composer Edward Algar.  The part of Diana is being danced by Schaufuss's wife, Zara Deakin (all you Freudians out there - what do you think of that?).

Opening night was Tuesday in Manchester, and the reviews have been mixed.  Some comments include describing the ballet as "simplistic, uninspired and clunky" and "a future camp classic" (Lyndsey Winship, The Independent), while The Times reviewer Ismene Brown felt the audience treated the performance as a "twisted panto".  Schaufuss had hoped to take his ballet to the West End, but with reviews like that...

Lezah

Are you quick to accept questionable booze from mysterious strangers?

Does talking about BBQ's and/or Lego get you excited?

Do you have every single line in the movie Wayne's World memorized?

Have you ever woken up drunk and seventeen underneath a big pile of sneakers to a kitchen-full of people yelling "shoeman!! shoemaaan!!"?

Don't you think 'Ghettochip Malfunction' is an awesome name for a remix of an already awesome Beck song?

Want another one?A double?

You and I will get along just fine.

Mike

Gold Soundz

so drunk, in the August sun
and you're the kind of girl i like
because you're empty, and i'm empty
and you can never quarantine the past
-by Pavement

The layer of grime clinging to the inside of the shower curtain has accumulated such a thickness that it is now starting to peel off in flaps; its own weightiness pulling it down into the water where it swirls momentarily before retreating down the drain pipe.

The old saying is true.

If you leave a mess for long enough, say about a year and a half, it will eventually clean itself.

Sleep will come easy tonight.

Mike

Signs of the Looming Apocalypse

- the new Barenaked Ladies Variety Show. (on Fox!)
- packs of hundreds of stray dogs attacking small European villages.
- Martin Lawrence: Governor of California.
- next-gen cell phones that can fit inside a TicTac.
- Rasputin still alive; in talks with Osama.
- Pizza Hut's new 'Hospital Lovers' pizza, with crust stuffed with your choice of BBQ chicken nuggets or hearty rib lasagna.
- "and the Grammy goes to... Paris Hilton!"
- Bush winning the election.
- new! Atkins for pets!
- Michael Jackson marries goat; bears its children in new reality television series... on Fox!

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When I was young, I always thought it was so stupid that when watching a movie with actors who portrayed German soldiers, they spoke English, but with a German accent.  I can understand why this was done:  if they spoke German, obviously, most people watching wouldn't understand what was being said, and by having them speak with an accent, it made them seem more 'German'.  I still figured it was unnecessary, though.

Even more curious is a trend I have noticed lately, where English speaking actors from Britain or Down Under are speaking English, but with an American accent. Cases in point:  the incredibly gifted Hugh Laurie in 'House'; Jake Weber in "Medium"; Hugh Jackman, Mel Gibson, Heath Ledger... the list goes on.  The even more bizarre thing, in my opinion, is that in the case of House, Laurie is disguising his British accent while another actor on the series has an Australian accent.  What's that all about?  Why one, and not the other?

And then you get the reverse, where an American actor affects a British accent for a role, such as James Marsters who played the oh-so-luscious Spike in Buffy the Vampire Slayer.  Now, his accent was good, unlike the actress who early on played his girlfriend.  Her whiny, "Spoioioioioioioioioike," is a huge joke in my house - fortunately, she did not last long on the series.  And I can kind of understand why they have to do this:  there probably aren't tons of British actors running around the States available for these type of parts.

 
But the others - why is it necessary?

Please explain, somebody - I need to understand...

Lezah

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When I was in high school we went to a junior high for three years and then to a senior secondary for grades 11 and 12.

In addition to the inevitable anxiety that surrounds any major life change (including changing schools), we (or at least, I) experienced significant anxiety over the course selection process, since (as the counselors said) whatever decisions we made would affect the rest of our LIVES and determine our CAREERS and once we signed up for something we COULD NOT CHANGE OUR MINDS and so therefore we'd better BE SURE because once you were in the high school, that WAS IT - there was NO GOING BACK.

Well, the good little girl who was me sitting in academic classes had a major meltdown right then and there, and I believe I morphed into the prototype for the 'slacker' generation as I promptly dropped all academics, took what were commonly referred to as 'basketweaving courses', and lied to my loving parents for the next two years about what I was doing in school (for example, "No Mom, English M doesn't mean modified, it means medium, for people who aren't really smart and aren't really dumb - like me!").

Of course, a short time in the senior high school confirmed for me that I had made a HUGE mistake - but as I had been told, there was no going back. I was stuck.

Shortly after graduating I embarked on a long and arduous journey to rectify my error, which involved re-enrolling in school and picking up my academics, and then going from there to college then university, and then finally getting my career, well behind that of my age-related peers, who are now mortgage free, while I will still be paying off my mortgage well into my old-age - if I don't die first.

So, you can imagine how I felt when I read in the paper this morning that some C&W broadcasting corporation is currently looking for a person to write a blog about The Dukes of Hazzard, which is soon coming back in re-runs to coincide with the release of the movie.  They are planning on paying $100,000 a year for someone to review five DoH episodes a week.

What is it that they say about test-taking strategies - that your first instinct is usually the correct one, so don't go back and change it?  Looks like that applies to my life, too:  if only, if only, IF ONLY I had stuck to my guns, been happy with the slacker courses, spent the following years hanging around the house watching old re-runs, I would be probably overqualified for this job.

I obviously have very bad karma.

Lezah

You know those things that are so old, so stodgy, so staid and stuffy that you are absolutely sure that no matter what, they could never jump into the 21st century, never move past that place in time where we left them long, long ago?  I'm thinking of those little plastic rain hats old ladies used to wear (and sometimes still do!); those rubber overshoes people put on to protect their shoes in bad weather; and those gawd-awful La-Z-Boy recliners that you used to see in the living rooms (always parked right in front of the television set) of every old person you ever visited.  I was beginning to think that there was a corrolation between ownership of one of those butt-ugly chairs and death - it seemed that everyone that owned one died.  Okay, maybe it had something to do with these people being old, old, old, but still - I think it's something someone should look into.

But now, wow!  Todd Oldham, fashion-turned-home-furni shing designer, has produced a sharp new line for La-Z-Boy for the mainstream furniture market that is ultra-hip.  An urban aesthetic is the springboard for the brilliant design enhancement that is both creative and fun.  Sleek styles, funky patterns, and clean lines all make this retro chic line something to consider if you are looking for home furnishings.

Because really, La-Z-Boy was famous for its quality - actually, that was their motto:  their name was "synonymous with comfort and quality".  For a company that was started in 1929 by two cousins working 16 hours day in a Michigan garage, a company that survived the depression, a company that was shut down for six years as part of the war effort - this is a company that did really well:  after inventing the much copied recliner in its early days, the company went public in the 1970, and by the end of the decade was worth in excess of $152 million.

However, the name had become, for some, synonymous not with comfort and quality, but rather with a bland and bulky aesthetic.  The collaboration with Oldham will certainly put an end to that.         

Did you know that the population of Scotland is currently 5.05 million, and that number is expected to fall to 4.89 million by 2009?  De-population is a huge concern in Scotland these days -  the population of Scotland in 1811 was 1.8 million, in 1861 was 3 million, and by 1911 had risen to 4.7 million.  The peak was hit in 1971, when it topped 5.2 million, and has been in decline ever since.  Scotland is currently recruiting new citizens, and Americans are the largest group immigrating - but still the numbers keep falling.

Certainly the Scottish existance could be a difficult, hard-scrabble one at times, considering the climate, geography and political repression the country experienced.  But in spite of the unforgiving aspects of life in this land, its inhabitants have made some amazing achievements.  For instance:Did you know that the richest woman in the world is a Scot who lives in Edinburgh (hint:  she's also a writer of a famous series of 'children's' books)?  And did you know that Edinburgh is one of the top financial centres of Europe?  Did you know that one of the top universities in Europe is in Scotland?

Did you know that during the war years, the Glaswegian fighting forces were considered the toughest, bravest and most fearless?  Did you know that the founding fathers of the second biggest country in the world, Canada, were Scottish?

Did you know that Scotland is where the Royal Family has their vacation home?  Did you know that the Edinburgh Fringe Festivals is one of the premiere cultural events in Europe (if not the world)?

Do you remember all those Scottish writers, inventors, and politicians who helped change the world - people who made it a better place?  Individuals like the poet, Robbie Burns; writer, Robbie Louis Stevenson; Alexander Graham Bell, inventor of the telephone; Alexander Fleming, discoverer of penicillin; Charles Macintosh, inventor of waterproof fabric and elastic; John Logie Baird, inventor of the television; James Clerk Maxwell, inventor of the radio; James Young Simpson, inventor of anaesthesia; James Watt, inventor of the Improved Steam Engine; or Joseph Lister, inventor of antiseptics, to name but a few.

Even in popular music, Scotland is an over-achiever.  From the '60s, we have Donovan Leitch and Stu Sutcliffe (of the Beatles) who were Scottish-born.  In the 1970s, two hugely popular bands (depending upon which demographic you fell into) hailed from Scotland:  the rockers Nazareth and the teen heart throbs The Bay City Rollers (remember Woody?).  And did you know that both Bon Scott and Angus Young of AC/DC were born in Scotland?  Or Ian Anderson of Jethro Tull?  How about these bands:  Thin Lizzy, Sweet, The Average White Band - all had members who were Scottish.  What about Al Stewart and Gerry Rafferty?  And during the '80s - what about Pre-Fab Sprout, or the Jesus and Mary Chain?  Or Simple Minds, Big Country, Teenage Fan Club, Aztec Camera, and Orange juice? How about Mark Knopfler of Dire Straits, or Annie Lennox of The Eurythmics?  By the '90s, Scotland had produced musical innovators like the Beta Band, and Belle and Sebastian.  And what about The Proclaimers or Travis?  And, of course, today, one of the top new bands in the world, Franz Ferdinand, is proudly Scottish.  In the past six months, I've seen about three great new bands that hail from Scotland - just the other night I saw another one, Shout Out Louds.

What do you think - is it something in the water over there?  I can't think of any other place that historically has produced so many stellar individuals, in spite of such a small population base. There's got to be some explanation for it...   

There are a few trends that have been popping up with greater frequency these days:

narrow leg pants - I was at the Futureheads' show the other night, and practically every band member in all three bands wore pants without a flair. I've been hearing a lot about this particular street fashion in London and other areas of the UK over the past year or so; at New York Fashion Week in February, a number of designers were showing this style, too.

long hair for men - also noticed at the Futureheads show, about 1/2 of the band members had long hair.  Fortunately it's not that stringy, scraggly Neil Young look, but more like a relaxed, wavy shoulder length 'do; think Johnny Depp or Antonio Banderas.

weight lifting for kids - although this trend hasn't really hit Canada yet, apparently it is sweeping the States at this time.  In an attempt to address the weight problem in America's youth, gyms are installing kid sized weight machines and changing their age policies; the jury is still out in the health and medical profession as to any long term negative effects of this type of regime for children.

the colour purple - and we're not talking about either the book or movie of the same name, nor are we alluding to any Donny Osmond preferences.  The colour purple is appearing prominently inboth print ads and in clothing these days.

long, wavy hair in women - that's right, as soon as I cut all of my hair off, long , wavy hair comes back in.  Just my luck...

I've seen a couple articles recently about the 'latest trend in eyewear'.  To be honest, it might be a trend but I doubt it will be a big one:  pierced glass is the trend, and it involves eye glasses mounted on a barbell pierced through the bridge of one's nose.

This curious crossbreed of art and technology was invented by James Sooy, a 22 year old Texan with an interest in body piercings.  Advantages of this type of eyewear are that your glasses will never again get lost, or slide down your nose.  One of the many disadvantages is that a five-month to one year healing process is required after the initial piercing before the glasses can be mounted to the barbell.  As well, Joan Hansen, president of the Canadian Association of Optometrists, feels that there will be difficulties in using these glasses for those with progressive lenses or bifocals; likewise, a twist to the axis will change the prescription in a negative way.

 
As someone who doesn't even have pierced ears, I can tell you that I won't be standing in line for this procedure.  Frankly, I have a thing about pain - call me crazy - but tattoos, brandings, piercings and all the other forms of self-mutilation are things I have avoided in my own wimpy way.

Perhaps I was scared off from all forms of body modification in my impressionable years when I read Frank Miller's The Dark Knight series, a black tale about the return of Batman to an almost apocalyptic landscape.  The villains in this piece are a maladjusted, blood-thirsty gang called the Mutants who are into self-mutation of all forms, including filing their teeth and other disturbing yet visually awe-inspiring characteristics.  Those are looks not to be taken lightly, and I look I don't necessarily aspire to.

However, if you are still interested in getting this new form of eyewear, go to http://www.piercedglasses.com...

Ever notice how, at night, a deep pothole full of slush can take on the appearance of solid ground? You're expecting your foot to hit pavement, and before you can say 'what the ...?' your sock is assaulted with five litres of icy sludge water.

Cue profanity.

This is bad enough when it happens on your way home, but getting pooched like this, a few steps out your, door is criminal.

sock wet.
foot cold.
day ruined.
weaksauce.

Mike

the sky was a strange color today.
the young man who threatened Ron and I with a knife a few weeks ago came in to buy cigarettes (20 pack of Player's Light King-size.) His demeanor was the same, but at least he wasn't swinging a blade around.

ah.. the first snow... and snow begat salt, and salt begat slush, and slush begat nervous hysteria.

I spend most of my downtime making lists; oh these troublesome lists.
prose and cons.

People often ask what the hell I plan on doing with the rest of my life and my only response is, up up down, down left right left right, B A B A ,select start.
Having trouble keeping track of medicine.

Maybe it's just me, but the phrase "Alcohol may Intensify this effect" is not a deterrent, it's actually rather inviting.

Long live personal science.
I've got a mouthful of bad ideas.
The heat, my friends, is on.

Mike

Lima, Peru -- "Peruvian police say they have seized nearly 1,540 pounds (700 kilograms) of cocaine hidden in frozen giant squid bound for Mexico and the United States."
Estimated street value: $17.5 million.

They stole my idea!
How could this possibly fail?
It's fucking bulletproof.

Mike

Welcome to the fold my new friend.
Devil wine.
I botched the cork job and have been chewin' grits ever since, but Goddamn that's a fine bottle of merlot. Hell, Satan's even got his mug pasted on the side of the bottle. If it's notable enough for his endorsement, it's certainly good enough for me.

Mike

St. Patrick's Day is coming up March 17.  All over the western world, people celebrate by dressing in green and over-imbibing.  Sounds like my kind of holiday!

Last Saturday night, I spent the evening at Vancouver's Scottish Cultural Centre, where they were offering a St. Patrick's evening with a variety of acts including Celtic dancing, bagpipe playing, and a traditional quartet called Westwind.

Accompanied by a guitar player, the singers in Westwind performed a variety of folk songs, from well-known Scottish and Irish folk songs and ballads, to songs they had written themselves.  They are a newly formed act and have already played a number of dates around town. The next function at the Scottish Cultural Centre will be a traditional Scottish Ceilidh on the evening of April 2.

Other St. Patrick's Day events are happening around the continent this weekend, including a full weekend of activities in Vancouver at a variety of locations.

http://www.celticfestvancouver.com" title="http://www.celticfestvancouver.com" target="_blank"http://www.celticfestvancouve...

Apparently - and this is according to Mojo magazine - the word of the year is "angular", as in: "That band sounds angular". Interpol? They're angular. Franz Ferdinand? Angular. Futureheads. They're angular too! What makes it so fun to describe bands this way is: it doesn't mean anything! I could just as well call them pointy! And speaking of pointy music - not to mention stop/start and herky-jerk - the Futureheads top the list of bands that have gone back to drink from the mainspring of late seventies art-pop. Their debut album definitely hovered high on my list of top albums of last year. In fact, I much preferred it to Franz Ferdinand's debut, which, while good, suffered from "anaemia of the hook", whereas on the Futurehead's album every song is memorable and eminently hummable (only Danger of the Water is not album-worthy and should have been relegated to a b-side).

The Futureheads must be so sick of having XTC thrown in their faces, but if you're going to live by the angular pop sound, you're going to die by the angular pop sound and the Futureheads have definitely built their sound on the template laid out by XTC on their first two albums. And there's nothing wrong with that! Music was evolving so fast at that time that XTC basically dropped their herky-jerk, start/stop sound after Go2 and moved on to the more straight-ahead rock/pop style of Drums and Wires and Black Sea (and then on to the avant-pop of English Settlement, Mummer, et al.). There's plenty to explore in this style and the Futureheads have made it their own by adding high-energy harmonies that mirror the tricky rhythms of their music and a rough, pop punk sound that makes me think of the early Jam. Although Andy Gill produced some of the songs on the album, the Gang of Four is the one influence that's mentioned a lot that I don't hear.

So, brilliant stuff, but could they pull it off live? It's one thing in the studio to harmonize and come over all "angular" but quite another in a live setting with sore throats after fifteen shows and a nasty buzz coming from the monitor. The Futureheads more than pulled it off, however. They came off like a precision drill team with their perfect harmonies and their impeccable playing. Songs like "A to B", "Meantime" or "He Knows" with their really tricky song structures benefited from the visceral energy of being played live and it was great fun watching them trade off vocals and exuberantly sing together. They didn't even wear those in-ear monitors! Of course, as a young band, they basically played their cd live: opening with the first song, "Le Garage", and ending the encore with the last song on the album, "Man Ray". Obviously they mixed it up a bit and they also left off Danger of the Water (you see?). They played a song I didn't recognize, either a cover or a new song. As well as a few covers I did know: the Television Personalities' "Picture of Dorian Grey", Neil Young's "Piece of Crap" and their brilliant, emotive version of Kate Bush's equally touching "Hounds of Love".

Opening the show was LA's High Speed Scene, a three piece who reminded me a little bit of the Knack (I really like the Knack) and Fountains of Wayne, but they're totally their own thing - I'm just trying to give you some basis for comparison. The singer/guitarist was a great big ham and really funny, but he looked completely like Albert Lee of Ten Years After circa Woodstock. I thought they were going to start playing "Going Home" or whatever that interminable song was called. They gave out a two-song teaser for their new cd, which is coming out in March. Both songs were great live and they sounded equally good on the promo, which is a relief as so often songs that sound great live sound kind of weak on an album.

Speaking of weak, the second band of the night was the Shout Out Louds or as I came to know them, the band with bad shoes. The audience seemed to enjoy them (or were they just being polite?), but they weren't really my cup of tea. They were a largish group with five players and a group that size should really know how to play. Instead, they were shambolic with a lot of hard-concentrating-bent-o ver-one's-instrument-play ing that made mud of the sound mix (and it was good all night). If anyone sees the bass player please tell him that he's supposed to play with the drum beat, not near the drum beat. That's why you guys are called the rhythm section (implying a working together type situation, you see). Their sound was a kind of an anaemic Velvet Underground via the Jesus and Mary Chain with yelping vocals that made me think of Robert Smith of the Cure. If any of this sounds good to you…well, I don't tell you my problems.
Beside that one hiccup though, the show was great. When the Futureheads or High Speed Scene comes through town again I'll happily be bobbing my head down at the front. Hope I see you there.

Christie Smythe and Andrea Lenczner are collaborating on a new collection called Smythe. The Smythe line offers five variations of fitted jackets, including a peacoat, a blazer, and a double breasted jacket; materials/patterns used include wool, velvet, brocade, tartan, houndstooth check, and plaid. Very cute, very now.

Prices range from $295-$650.

Lezah

Coming down fast
They've finally found me.
Those money grubbing weasels have found me and they're closing in. And of course by 'money grubbing weasels' i mean Nova Scotia Power. (Wonder why they suddenly need cash?)
For years I've lived under their radar; moving from place to place, lining all my hats and pants with aluminum foil, a colorful assortment of oh-so-sexy wigs.
But they got me.
I've been politely informed that not only has my credit been ruined, it's probably been ruined x3 to the eighteenth power.
And they keep repeating those four little words.
Pay in full. Immediately.
There go my dreams of owning a Lexus.

Also, if you goateed crap-slingers at Columbia House are reading this, it's already too late.
I'm writing this transmission from the dark belly of an unmarked Scandinavian ocean liner filled with immigrant slaves and bootleg digital electronics.
Destination: unknown.

Mike

The fight is on: it's the Granville Island Public Market merchants vs. big business.

It appears that the Market on Granville Island, at one time the highest-grossing retail space (per square foot) in North America, is no longer at the leading edge; food sales there increased only 1.1% last year, compared to 9.8% province-wide. High-end specialty food stores such as Urban Fare and Capers are springing up all over, cutting into the Market's share.

The powers that be are directing merchants to change a number of key factors in the way the Market is currently run including working longer hours, which the tenants, mostly small, family-run businesses, are vociferously protesting.

So, stay tuned for more on this David vs. Goliath battle.

Lezah

Once upon a time, in a place far away...

The other night, I attended the opening night of the Royal Winnipeg Ballet's newly commissioned ballet 'A Cinderella Story' with my three nearest and dearest.  It was, in a word, fantastic.

I'm sure you're familiar with the story of Cinderella - after all, it's been around in one form or another for the last 2700 years.  The version most people know best was written by Charles Perrault in the late 1600s.  Within the next hundred years or so, the first ballet adaptation of Cinderella was performed in Vienna, although the version most ballet-goers are familiar with is the one first performed in Moscow in 1945 based on a score by Prokofiev.

What we saw last night was something completely different again.  Inspired by the 100th anniversary of the birth of Broadway composer Richard Rodgers, who had written a Cinderella score both for Broadway and a famous 1957 TV special starring 21 year old Julie Andrews, San Fransisco-based choreographer Val Caniparoli was granted special access to Rodgers' songbook by the Rodgers Trust, and from that Caniparoli was able to develop a score based on some previously little-known Rodgers music.

So, what we ended up seeing was an updated Cinderella, and this was one in which the lines were blurred between dance and theatre.  I have always harboured a strong dislike of musical theatre, and yet this ballet is the closest thing I've ever seen to a Broadway show - and I still enjoyed it immensely.

The story you already know, but this one uses a 1957 setting as a springboard into a fantastically sophisticated  time and place.  Sandra Woodall, Scenic and Costume Designer, takes us from a modernerist house in the style of Joseph Eichler, to an Arthur Murray dance school, and from there to a ballroom. The colour palette she uses for both the costumes and the sets are muted jewel tones; the costumes themselves are gorgeous, timeless pieces inspired by the Haute Couture of the late 1950s. The music, a mix of jazz, blues, and be-bop, showcases Rodgers, but also features his collaborations with Oscar Hammerstein and Lorenz Hart.  Jazz conductor Ron Paley and his Big Band were right on the money all night; in fact, after the curtain closed, they continued playing, gathering a large and appreciative crowd. The dancers were all wonderful, but my personal favourite was RWB veteran Tara Birtwhistle in the role of the evil stepmother.

From dance to music to theatre, this evening was a wonderful blend of entertainment, and last night's performance was the only ballet I have attended to which the audience gave a wholehearted standing ovation.

Lezah  

Here's a band ready to make it big in the US - and they can barely speak English!  Well, actually the members of Phoenix can speak English, but it's still a bit of a struggle, grammatically.  That doesn't stop them, however, from singing all of their songs in English, which they refer to as the 'Esperanto of music'.

You may have already heard them, without realizing it:  Phoenix was first outed to North American audiences through their track "Too Young" which was featured on Sophia Coppola's film 'Lost in Translation'.  Huge in Europe already, and wildly successful in Japan, Phoenix, who had been together now for more than ten years, just completed a short tour of the US in the fall, and their first live album, 'Thirty Days Ago', was released in North America in February.

With influences ranging from Serge Gainsbourg through AC/DC to C & W, Phoenix merges hip hop, house and 'American' music in a sophisticated pop fashion.  As the former backing band for Air, the members of Phoenix are in touch with everything that's uber-hip in music today.

Definitely something to look into, oui?

Lezah

An acquaintance recently told me that today, close to 50% of the population of England proper is of Southeast Asian descent.  Whether that is true or not, I am not sure, but it would not surprise me, in light of a lot of the music that I hear coming out of England these days.

From the midst of England's social turmoil has risen the Asian underground.

Featuring diverse instrumentation, this music, commonly called Bhangra, has fused various elements of soul, disco, hip hop and punk with tabla beats and a reggae rhythm.  Fixed in terms of beats, Bhangra music uses a very danceable 4/4 timing.  And that is where it got its beginnings: in the mid 1980s, all over England, Southeast Asian kids would attend mid-day Bhangra raves, skipping school and momentarily forgetting their cultural alienation by taking to the dance floor. Then the music evolved underground, with homemade tapes and cds being sold in shops, bypassing the media and mainstream culture.

As the movement gained steam, artists like Karsh Kale, Talvin Singh, Kuly Singh and groups like Asian Dub Foundation developed followings.  Apache Indian had already brought a fusion of reggae and tabla music to mainstream culture, and it wasn't long before successful North American artists like Jay Z and Missy Elliot (in 'Get Ur Freak On') started adopting South Asian motifs for their music.  For a music still considered to be in its infancy, it will be interesting to see what happens as the global village gets smaller and cultures and continents continue to collide.

Lezah

Opening March 3/05 at the Queen Elizabeth Playhouse is the Tony winning play Copenhagen starring acclaimed hometown boy Brent Carver, himself a Tony winner, in his first Vancouver appearance since 1995.

Copenhagen is Michael Frayn's drama dealing with the meeting of physicists (Werner Heisenberg, played by Carver,and Neils Bohr) in Denmark during World War II.

The concept of the play revolves around Heisenberg coming to Denmark, a motivation which neither he, nor any of the other main characters, fully understand. This is mirrored, in a way, by his life work - specifically the Uncertainty Principle, for which he is famous.

The Uncertainty Principle basically is a concept from quantum physics with says that a subatomic particle's position and velocity remain unclear at any given time in the presence of an observer, who forever alters the experiment, since the observer becomes part of the experiment himself through the process of observation. A bit convoluted, no? However, this current runs through the play itself, forever altering the actions of the characters in a most interesting way.

This is one not to miss.

Lezah

The Beginning verse of "Suicide is Painless" from the movie, M*A*S*H starts...

Through early morning fog I see
visions of the things to be
the pains that are withheld for me
I realize and I can see...

then the all familiar refrain

that suicide is painless
it brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.

Having become "acquainted" with the trauma of several suicides as a teenager, then later as a counselor, I find myself having to deal with the subject once again. A friend telephoned to discuss a suicide that recently happened in her caseload, and Hunter S. Thompson decided on a grand finale with his grandchild (rumoured) present in the home.

Don't get me wrong - I cannot even begin to imagine the depths of mental/physical despair one must be experiencing to even engage such unalterable choice. However, I do take issue with the way one chooses to exit this life.

Pills, a bag over head, as directed by a certain book or a visit from the "Dr. Kervorkians" out there seems almost palatable. Well thought out, not too messy, loved ones are all aware of the intent. Pretty straight forward. It's the splashy suicides - hanging in a place where a loved one, or general public, will find you; blowing yourself away in front of an impressionable audience - that makes my blood boil.

Is this true depths of despair, or one last tragic. "Hey, look what I can do" ?

Yes, it is a last despondent cry for help and also an irreversible, selfish, last "so there!" on those left to pick up the pieces of their lives.

Perhaps the M*A*S*H refrain should be:
'cause suicide is selfish
your death creates a fallout, of
emotions loved ones bear with guilt and tears.

Christine

both of them wear red.
both have beards.
both come from places of extreme temperature.
both have horned minions (reindeer/demons).
both make young children act crazy.
both sneak into your house at night.
coincidence?
no.
he gets two paychecks this way.
either that or a separated-at-birth thing.

Mike

A cat is placed in a box, together with a radioactive atom. If the atom decays, a hammer kills the cat; if the atom doesn't decay, the cat lives. As the atom is considered to be in either state before the observer opens the box, the cat must thus be considered to be simultaneously dead and alive.

- Erwin Schrodinger's Cat Paradox, 1935

Mike

tempestuous
regurgitate
polydactyl
conducive
iconoclastic
thrombosis
phantasmagoria
mollusk

Mike

I was recently reading an interview with a music journalist who had been involved in the industry for over thirty years, and when asked what the 'next big thing' was going to be, her reply was Jamaican Dancehall Music. That piqued my interest, and what I ended up learning was a lot about the evolution of, and globalization of, this highly controversial form of music.

Dancehall had its roots in reggae, and also connections with rap and hip-hop. Jamaican Dancehall Music is the folk music of Jamaica; is still present in its original form, but it has also morphed into something a lot more 21st Century. In the 1960s, a Jamaican citizen named Clive Campbell (DJ Kool Herc) immigrated to the US, and by the mid 1970s he had invented the breakbeat.  By mixing reggae, funk and Latin inspired music with this breakbeat he developed the foundation for what would later become hip-hop.

Unlike European music, which has melody as its cornerstone, African music depends on layering, rhythmic creativity, and orality.  From this, Jamaican dancehall music was born, and today a third element has been added: technology.  With sound systems becoming increasingly more sophisticated, and the world becoming a much smaller place, Jamaican dancehall music has travelled to the US and England and taken up elements of those locales.  Primarily an inner city musical form, Kingston, New York and the larger English cities have all embraced this music.

Today, in addition to the original folk form, there are three primary categories of lyrics: gun tunes (like those made popular in the late '80s and early '90s by DJs like Ninjaman and Cutty Ranks; these lyrics are competitive and combative, boastful and violent); informer tunes (dealing with individuals who spy on others and give information to the police); and battyman or anti-gay lyrics (which are currently much in the news in both Jamaica and England, where it is also known as 'murdermusic').

For more information about Jamaican Dancehall Music, try reading Norman Stolzoff's book Wake the Town and Tell the People: Dancehall Culture in Jamaica, or look up dancehall music on http://www.jahworks.org.

I own a horse, and since horses have notoriously finicky digestive systems, I decided to educate myself on plants which are bad for horses. Turns out pretty much everything that grows in a garden, from azaleas to laurels, yews to tomatoes, disagree with horses. Likewise, half of the plants currently growing in my horse's field have been known to cause problems. Yikes!

Well, now there's a place you can go that will give you my experience from the human perspective. It turns out that in northeastern England, at the Duchess of Northumberland's Alnwick Garden, a new and very controversial garden has been opened:  the poison garden. With everything from opium poppies to coca, magic mushrooms to cannabis, Alnick is now the third most visited garden in all of Britain. Looking at the plants there, it just makes me wonder what kind of demographic they were shooting for - and why?

Valentine's Day is just behind us, spring is in the air, and I think we might have just enough time to plan for a June wedding.  Are you in?

It turns out there are a number of new trends in the wedding biz these days, so you're going to have to satisfy your craving for fruitcake at someplace other than our wedding, because we ain't servin' that crap!

Here's what's what:

- have your wedding and reception all in one place, rather than the traditional morning church service followed by a reception elsewhere
        - have your wedding midweek rather than on the weekend (you'll save big bucks doing it this way!)
        - remember all that money you saved by having your wedding midweek?  Well, you're going to spend your savings on lots and lots and lots of guests.
        - food can be anything from Mediterranean and Asian to cocktails and hors d'oeuvre instead of the traditional formal sit-down dinner
        - forget the fruitcake, can the cake:  it's cupcakes all the way!
Well, there you have it!  Have a happy wedding!

For more articles like this go to http://www.swanktrendz.com

Okay, I'll admit it:  I watch America's Next Top Model - and I love it!  I've been an addict since the first season, and it's been interesting to watch the evolution of this show over the four series. Tyra Banks has obviously hit on something that America wants, considering that this show just keeps getting bigger and bigger, and many of the girls from this show have gone on to do well in the industry.  The format of ANTM was even copied (rather badly) by the producers of Sports Illustrated's Swimsuit Model recently.

While I don't think any personalities will ever rival those seen in the first season, where the Bible Belt (Robin and friends) met the atheist and the rocker chick, there have been some interesting developments on the show.  The fourth season started tonight, and we saw the biggest cast ever, where 35 women started only to go through two cuts - from 35 to 20, and by the end of the show, from 20 to 14.  Personally, I could do with a little less of the 'suspense building', and I think bringing candidates (like Mary, from Portland) on for two seasons only to cut them in the first episodes both times is tantamount to torture.  But, like I said:  guilty pleasure.  I love it in spite of its flaws, faults and unfairness - oh, I'm so wicked...  

Martha gets out of the clink this week; she's done hard time, and rumour has it she even got inked while inside - a blueberry muffin on her butt (kidding!).

Seriously though, after declining sales in her publishing sector and a magazine that's been getting progressively smaller each month she's in prison, all of a sudden things are looking up: her stock prices have tripled in the last few months and prices are said to be going even higher; there will be a new show starring Martha that's a Donald Trump-style Apprentice show; and maybe the best news of all, Martha's dropped a number of dress sizes and is looking positively svelte, and sporting a new 'do to boot.  A new woman, a new beginning...

There's a new mannequin out in stores these days - a womanly mannequin.

 Previously the average mannequin would be a size 5 and measure in at around 5'10". Considering that the dress size for the average  American women these days is size 14, the fact that this new mannequin is a size 10 makes it a little closer to the North American reality. Described as more "girlie, hippy, curvaceous", this mannequin has larger hips and chests, reminiscent of the females shapes that were popular in the 1950s, like those of Marilyn Monroe and Jane Russell.

It's about time!
Lezah

I'm not a linear person and I don't like doing things in a linear way. For example: beer, whiskey, beer, jager, whiskey, beer, beer, tequila, beer, whiskey, etc. I was expected to arrive at work around 8 am. No dice. I did not arrive at work at all. I didn't call in (although they called me numerous times.) I just didn't show. Will this cause me trouble in the near future? most definitely. Do i care? Probably not.

The first recognizable thought that entered my damaged little mind this morning was this: "Work Is Not Happening Today."

I believe Tom Waits said it best, "Well the dawn cracked hard just like a bullwhip, cause it wasn't takin' no lip from the night before."

Mike

Some notable prizewinners of late include Vancouver's Charles Montgomery, author of The Last Heathen, who yesterday won the $25,000 Charles Taylor Prize for Literary Non-Fiction. Montgomery's book is based in part on the writings of his grandfather, an English bishop who lived in Melanesia in the 1890s.

Another big Canadian winner recently was Chris Landreth who won an Oscar on Sunday for his 3-D short film Ryan, which is based on the life of Ryan Larkin, an animator with the NFB who now makes his living panhandling.

Lezah 

Pampered pooches are everywhere - a case in point being Paris Hilton's Chihuahua Tinkerbell.  My friend's dog recently spent time in a swanky Yaletown hotel doing a photo shoot for Modern Dog magazine.  It's a sad comment on my world that the only working model I know happens to be of the canine persuasion...

In cities all over North America, stores catering to wealthy dog owners are springing up faster than you can say Fido.  In Vancouver, stores like Fetch (www.fetchstore.ca) and Barking Babies (www.barkingbabies.com) are carrying items like Swarovski crystal encrusted collar and leash sets ($195), specialty t-shirts, and totes that retail from $129 to $349.

My own dog recently cost me just under $1000 in vet bills (the dog herself cost us about $200 at the SPCA) after it was discovered that she had cancer and needed surgery. Fortunately, the prognosis is good and she will likely not require any further treatment.

Researching canine cancer on the internet, I discovered that another form of canine cancer, lymphomas, are commonly treated with chemotherapy (to the tune of $5000-7000) - all to gain, on average, four more months for poor little Poochini.

It seems to me that in both the case of the medical treatments and the expensive doggie clothes, than perhaps dog owners are shelling out the big bucks as much (if not more) to please themselves than they are for the well-being of their dog. Just a thought...

Lezah

We’ve managed to see three of the groups nominated for best “New Group of the Year” and I think my vote will be for Alexisonfire. The ofther nominees are:

The Waking Eyes,

The Marble Index,

Death From Above,

and Thorrnley.

One question, though. Where’s Boy?

The Junos will be shown on April 5th.

Christine