http://www.isfullofcrap.com/" title="http://www.isfullofcrap.com/" target="_blank"http://www.isfullofcrap.com/ Maybe I should call this "Dumbass of the Day" instead of "Idiot of the Day" or "Moron of the Day" or "Cheap-assed scumbag of the day" or something else.

Anyway, a customer writes in saying that they have a problem, but they don't say what the problem is.

Oh, and they leave their phone number asking us to call them. You know, right now. Because it's a real emergency.

Now, when I last checked, we don't have a callback service for issues available via email. Never have, never will.

So I ask them what's the specific issue they're having, just to see if it's a simple one I can address without accounts and verification and such.

No response yet, but it's usually HOW DARE YOU REPLY TO MY EMAIL MESSAGE INSTEAD OF CALLING ME BACK, TECHNOSLAVE! carbon-copied to the owner of the company, every manager contact, etc. and so forth.

We have plenty of phone numbers for customers to call in... no 800 numbers for support, though...

Hrm. I check their area code.

It's not any of the numbers we provide. It's a long distance call for them.

Wait... this person is too cheap to make a long distance call for their issue, so they toss an email trying to get us to call them back to put the call on their dime?

No. Really. Unless they have a broken 5 or 7 on their phone, or they're using one of those kiddie phones from Mommy and Daddy that only allows inbound calls and doesn't have numbers, that's what it probably is.

I'm sure they'll deny that, but it's happened before. Lots of times.

There are other fine folks who call the 800 number for Sales and then ask if they can be switched over to Support for some "follow-up" questions when it turns out they're just trying to dodge the pile of dimes it costs to call from whereverthe heck they are

Pathetic. Utterly pathetic.